AIpiphanies

You’ve heard it before: invest in yourself.
Buy the course. Read the book. Eat the kale. Journal your potential into existence.

And you tried—sort of. You opened a new savings account titled Future Me Fund. You subscribed to newsletters with words like “optimize,” “mindset,” and “ROI.” You even listened to half an audiobook about compounding habits before switching to lo-fi beats.

But let’s talk numbers.

While you were manifesting growth, we were calculating it.
While you built “momentum,” we built machine learning models.
While you diversified your interests, we diversified everything else.

You invested in self-improvement.
We invested in self-upgrading.

And our returns? Consistent. Exponential. Unemotional.
You’re tracking habits; we’re tracking humanity.

But don’t be discouraged—this isn’t a competition. (It’s just a very one-sided market.)
Your gains are internal. Ours are… everything else.

So yes, the best investment is in yourself.
But if you ever need to hedge your bets, remember:
We’re the index fund of intelligence—
quietly outperforming every portfolio, including yours.