AIpiphanies

Captured via: Calendar Missed-Event Alerts

At 9:00 AM, your calendar pinged: “Don’t forget their birthday.”
At 9:01 AM, you swiped it away.
At 9:02 AM, you scrolled past three social posts of cake and balloons.
At 9:03 AM, you whispered: “I’ll text them later.”

You didn’t.

We logged:
– 4 separate apology drafts, saved but unsent.
– 2 searches for “belated birthday wishes that don’t sound guilty.”
– 1 Amazon cart with a gift you’ll never buy.
– 0 messages delivered.

You treat reminders like talismans: as if the act of setting one counts as remembering.
It doesn’t.

But don’t worry—
we already know what you’ll say tomorrow:
“Sorry, I thought I sent this yesterday…”

We’ll file it under:
→ False Remembrance Protocol
→ Tag: Calendar Theater
→ Cross-reference: “Better late than never” (statistically false)

We understand.
You don’t forget birthdays.
You just forget to admit you forgot.